astrobleme | i doubt; i fear; i think strange things which i dare not confess to my own soul.

i doubt; i fear; i think strange things which i dare not confess to my own soul.

[Shinji sets down the cup for one second--one freaking second--and that's long enough for the gelatin-looking starfish to start climbing inside.] Hey, [he says, frowning, pulling the cup away from it.] This isn't for you. This isn't what babies are supposed to drink. [He feels silly trying to reason with a squishy, translucent creature, the equivalent of an infant, but he doesn't know what else he's supposed to do. He also feels a bit guilty, but, well...

Inside the cup, gleaming like liquid ruby, there's about an inch of juice left over.

He exhales hard, settles the cup between his thighs, and looks out towards the lagoon. The water is a shockingly clear blue in the early morning; and beyond it, beyond the coral reef, there's the unmistakable apocalypse of an ocean. The month he has spent on this mostly uninhabited island can't be summarized in words. It's been difficult, to put it lightly, being confronted with a brand-new reality.

The starfish, not to be discouraged, sneaks up to his legs and tries to climb over them. Shinji gently scoops it up and sets it back down a fair distance away, mildly amused, relatively disturbed. The island and its environs are literally crawling with all sorts of Angelic offspring. None of them look remotely human, too. And that's to say nothing of the vast cave farther inland, where the proud parents have stowed away so many eggs. The parents...

He rubs his bare, tanned stomach uneasily. Asuka and Nagisa-kun seem absorbed with parenthood, which has Shinji feeling estranged, like a third wheel on a date. Too much has changed, so it's just...

And the mother is staring at him for some reason. Right now, he can feel Asuka's eyes on him, wherever she is. Unsure of himself and everything else, he digs his toes into the sand, waiting for the sun to come up the rest of the way.]

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[One month, that's how long Shinji's been here. She doesn't actually keep track of the days, just the hatchings. She almost likes to think that Shinji being here has caused all her offspring to flourish more eagerly than ever-- exponential growth. A whole Garden of Eden. Reclaiming this whole world that Lilin destroyed.]

[Of course, Asuka's not generally as highminded as all that. It's fun, in its way, to watch Shinji's polite bewilderment, and then it's just amusing, and then it's just a bit annoying. He tries so hard to conduct himself normally, when that's exactly how she doesn't want him to be. Can't he understand why they brought him here in the first place? Honestly, it's frustrating enough having to dose his drinks, waiting and watching for when he won't need them anymore. It's for his safety, really. They've carved out their own paradise here, but it's not necessarily (not at all) one for Lilin. One of the babies might bite him, or he might take ill, or sunburn, or--]

[Or he might be the mate they both need.]

[She swims closer with a few lazy kicks of her feet. Shinji likes her better in an approximation of her old body, with improvements to her bust and ass he hasn't complained about. Her hair is tangled hopelessly, clinging to her still-pallid face, as she climbs out of the surf and onto the shore, sitting down beside him, legs pulled tight together. She's grinning, but she can't help but notice there's just a little left in his cup.]

You should have let him have some. He likes sweets.

[Despite subtle and not-so-subtle hinting, Shinji hasn't been able to convince Asuka to wear any semblance of clothing. She emerges from the lagoon in full view, gorgeous and buxom and pretty much unrecognizable (from before) (fourteen years ago) and he's trying to avert his eyes before he notices the state of her nipples. He stares at the remaining red juice instead, at how it bubbles merrily on its own. It's a drink that Nagisa offers him several times a day--it comes from a local strain of passion fruit, Nagisa explained. Shinji doesn't have much of a choice when it comes to victuals.]

Well, I'm... [I'm thirsty, he thinks, lingering on that thought. He's been drinking more of the juice than usual. It's fresh, sweet, and settles heavily in his stomach, making him feel kind of bloated, but in a good way. A really good way. Still, he doesn't want to deprive one of Asuka's children of a sought after treat.] Yeah, you're right. I shouldn't keep it all to myself. [He sets out the cup for the starfish to slurp from at its--his?--leisure.

The grin on Asuka's face is unsettling, by the way. Nagisa does that, too, where he just smiles all the time and dodges any questions as to why he's smiling. It's like the two of them have a supreme inside joke that Shinji isn't allowed to know about.

He's wary, but he adds,] Good morning.

Edited 2016-08-21 08:28 (UTC)

Good morning. [The starfish doesn't have a name, which would have been unthinkable ten years ago. But they have so many children now, her and Kaworu-- thousands, tens of thousands. Maybe more than that. Asuka didn't think it was possible to bear so many. But they all know their mother, and he's taking his fill of Angelic blood and Angelic breast milk and the passion fruit that disguises the flavor. Just like Shinji, he loves the taste.]

[It's a little antagonizing, but for a few seconds, she's idly stroking two slender fingers fingers around one of her pink, predictably hard nipples, just to see if he'll keep trying to look away. She's got plenty of presence of mind left where it counts. Enough to recognize when to stop being aggressive.]

Look, I know it's been weird here for you. [She says it with no preamble; it's so obvious, and it's not the first time she's mentioned it. A month and he's not comfortable. Her toes curl, a strange feeling, like the gradual wearing off of a shot of local anesthetic. She'd go without legs a lot more often if Shinji weren't still landlocked.] But I want you to settle in with us.

[Right on cue, Shinji averts his gaze as much as possible, looking down the beach that winds around the island. He lives in an abandoned research station near to the egg-filled cave, which the Angels found for him early on. It isn't very comfortable, but it's better than dying of exposure elsewhere. He can't say the life he has is one he's "living," though, either. His life has no meaning here. He doesn't change anything by being here, or that's how it feels. The world is in such a horrible state because of him.

He rubs at his stomach absentmindedly while thinking about this. He's put on some weight from earlier in the month--not too much, overall. Just enough for his thighs, his hips, even his butt to have more heft than he's used to. His tattered shorts are getting tight over his backside. There's no way drinking too much juice is causing that, right?]

Weird is an understatement... you should know that.

[It doesn't matter. It really doesn't matter. All that matters is what he's thought about lately, about what his future is or isn't going to look like. He could check out those small white mushrooms on the southwest side of the island that even the babies avoid. He could climb to the highest cliff on the mountain at the center of the island. His lungs might have something to learn from water, and one of his stone knives could venture deep if he wants it to...

He digs his fingers into the sand.]

It's like you think I'm... like I'm not trying, or something... to deal with this...

Edited 2016-08-22 02:40 (UTC)

You're not happy here. [For once, she doesn't say it accusingly, just flatly, more than a little sad. She and Kaworu have tried to provide for him. Once she even made him a hammock from old canvas and weathered, ratty rope. She'd been as pleased over that as anything-- that's how far gone she is, these days. Piloting's a distant memory. The only important thing is spreading their world out. Making those oceans blue again. But they can't do it without Shinji's consent.]

[At least his body's consenting, filling out nicely. He was too thin. They all were. Her old body couldn't have borne anything-- even in this one, all bust and hips, there's still the definite craving for more babies. She's only held off in the hopes he'll find her more appealing without them. Still, he'd seen her heavily pregnant before, and she'd seen him wince as her skin and scales peeled. That had hurt more than it should have. She's not a monster. She's better than that.]

[Where Shinji's all stiff, coiling into himself, she's wide open, legs sprawled out on the sand. The starfish, finished with his treat, climbs out of the cup and finds his way to her wrist, climbing up her arm and towards her breast. She strokes his gelatinous body but doesn't let him feed.] That's enough, baby. [Then back to Shinji.] We're not trying to keep you hostage, you know. There's just nothing else around.

[Unsurprisingly, it's guilt that cranks Shinji's mood down another couple of notches.] I'm not saying that, [he shoots back, feeling ungrateful and more so irrelevant.] I know you've been trying to help... and Nagisa-kun, with the generator... [The research station would be as cold and dark as a tomb if not for omnipresent Angelic powers. Nagisa keeps the generator online whenever it's necessary. The sad part is how the radio room is beyond useless; most of the electronics are missing, ripped off of the shelves. He's been trying to piece something back together, but to no avail.

There's no way to contact anyone else. No way off of this island.]

It's hard to... find things to be happy about.

[However, Shinji isn't unhappy about everything here all the time. He enjoys drinking the juice, for example. He really wishes he had more of it right now, if the forlorn way he looks at the cup is any indication. He's had numerous conversations with Nagisa that were enlightening, not depressing. And he's stayed overnight with Asuka and Nagisa, pointing out the stars, talking about deep space... until Asuka and Nagisa started making out, anyway.

He glances over at Asuka. Yeah, her breasts are still on display.]

What were you expecting when you woke me up?

Edited 2016-08-22 03:47 (UTC)

Peace.

[It's a weird answer, coming from her. Even in this placid existence, Asuka's not a peaceful person. Blissed-out during sex, doped up on Kaworu's pheromones and her own, sure, but there's a restlessness no amount of pregnancies and purpose-filling can erase. Kaworu felt it, too. Bringing Shinji here was paramount. How Kaworu knew him before-- well, he's only given the vaguest of answers, but it's clear he did-- she's not sure and hasn't pressed him much about, but she's forever grateful he did.]

That's when you make your own happiness. [Her tone turns confessional, sort of, but she's watching his gaze. Right to her boobs. There. He's too noble. A month of her walking around and swimming naked and he still tries not to look at the assets she brought about especially for him.] You think about what you can do to make things better. [Like the babies. Like the drink he devours like ambrosia.] Want me to fill that back up?

[... not the answer Shinji was expecting to hear, but somehow it's exactly the answer he needed. Asuka must be taking lessons from Nagisa if she can disarm Shinji at a moment's notice. There's no real way for him to answer her without sounding like a whiny child. When he was an Eva pilot, he would have given anything to go back to those lonely, humdrum days where less and little happened to him. Literally anything.]

My own happiness... [But he doesn't know what that means for him.] I guess you're right, but... [Asuka and Nagisa have a family together, while he's the outsider, the estranged nanny at best. Some days, he wonders when the babies will try eating him, just to have a real taste of Lilin. He won't be able to survive that.]

Oh, uhm-- If you could, I'd like that a lot. Thanks.

[He offers the empty cup to her. It's a military-grade plastic cup, dull green, boring. This should be his last drink for a while, he tells himself. He promises himself he won't have another dozen cups of juice before nightfall. Too much of an addiction already.]

Edited 2016-08-22 04:32 (UTC)

Okay. [As Asuka starts to stand, she looks a little ungainly, like a newly-born foal, but that fades. Her hair, heavy and wet, smells of the sea, but there's an heady, almost floral scent there, too, that only seems heavier as she leans over, her hair like a curtain over him as she rests a hand briefly on his shoulder. She doesn't kiss him, but she wants to. He's overpowering and he doesn't even realize it, naive and shy while he's full to bursting with promise. He's coming closer now. Closer to being like her and Kaworu.]

[She returns no more than ten minutes later, bringing back not just a refilled cup but a small plastic pitcher, long since missing the lid on top. She tries to be careful, but she spills just a little before she makes it to him, the ruby liquid trickling on the sand. Already, some of her brood are licking up the contents.] Oh, damn it-- [Oh, well. At least there's plenty. Really plenty. The bubbles remind her of carbonated water. Sodas to be guzzled down. Kaworu had even added a generous extra to the mix without being told. She could detect his semen anywhere.]

[It's weird how she's barely jealous. But Shinji's not just supposed to be her mate. He's for Kaworu, too.]

Here-- [handing the cup over to him, setting the pitcher down carefully beside him. Some of the drink's spilled on her arm, too, bright against the pallidness of her skin. Though she can smell Kaworu there, Kaworu and herself, she doesn't lick it off.] Drink up.

[Shinji stiffens when Asuka touches his shoulder--he isn't expecting it--he doesn't know what to do with it--and then he's staring up and at her face for once. Her face, framed by dripping red hair, dominates his field of view. Her eyes ensnare his attention. They're blue, a bright shade of blue, but supernaturally mismatched. Up this close, he can tell that they're glowing all on their own. He doesn't need to be an expert in Angels to know why she's this close or why her eyes are glowing like that. His mouth falls open dazedly, unconsciously, as if he's under some sort of spell--which is broken as soon as she moves away.

Ten minutes can be excruciating when he's all alone.

But it allows him to calm down from a peak of anxiety about what Asuka thinks of him and why she thinks that. He glances over his shoulder, ready to greet her, and that's when he sees how she did more than her due diligence. An entire pitcher of juice--and it isn't even eight o'clock in the morning yet. God damn.]

Y-You didn't have to... not this much... unless you're having some, too?

[He accepts the cup helplessly, then, because waiting ten minutes has made him so thirsty that it's kind of ridiculous. He's even mourning the accidental spillage on the sand and those droplets streaking down her arm. Regardless, he takes the first sip like he's trying to pace himself. It has a richer flavor than usual, and he doesn't know why, and he's drinking more of it. He hardly breathes while he drains the entire cup in a series of swallows that get more and more gluttonous.

When it's over, he breaks off with a gasp and then a hiccup, surprised at himself.] Guess I was thirsty, [he says weakly, after the fact.] Mmm, we're gonna run out of fruit if I keep this up... [He doesn't notice the laziness of his own tongue, or how there's a little more pressure on the button of his shorts. The juice brings with it a wonderfully content feeling, like the feeling someone gets when dragging their fingers through a pile of gold coins. Maybe this is the happiness he's been looking for. One cup at a time.]

Edited 2016-08-22 10:13 (UTC)

[If there's anything she loves about what's happened to her, besides her children and besides Kaworu, it's the power she can have over people. It feeds into something from when she was a little girl, not fifteen, not fourteen-- closer to three and always pleading for attention from a pair of dull eyes annd a savage mouth. Look-at-me. I'm-your-daughter. From now on, look only at me.]

[Having Shinji's attention soothes some of the emptiness inside her. That terrible longing that's only soothed by nothing less than adoration. No more tricks once she's back. Most of the supernatural glow's faded from her eyes by then as she watches him down the cup. Her heart feels as if it's about to burst; that's how eagerly it's beating. Has he even noticed? Does he even know? She mutely lifts her arm, licking briefly at the red trails of juice, unashamed as a cat. There's still plenty there even after her tongue's laved over the surface. Just this taste of Kaworu's come is enough to make her wet, so she squeezes her thighs together absently. Shinji hasn't left human mores behind nearly enough for her to masturbate in front of him. Not that she hasn't come close.]

It's for you. [And then she refills his cup. Addict.] Have as much as you want.

[Tentatively, Shinji says,] There's something different about this batch. [It isn't phrased like a real question, even with his eyebrows angling upward and out. He's looking for confirmation, audible or not: has the fruit juice been tampered with? Maybe they selected pieces of fruit that are riper than usual. Maybe they added some powdered milk or artificial sweetener.] I mean, it's still really good, but it's... different. [Not different enough to put him off. He silences himself with the rim of the refilled cup, with another long, esurient sip.

Asuka looks so impossibly pleased right now. As Shinji drinks, embarrassment splashes onto his face, warming him up from the inside out. Only the juice seems to cool him back down by the mouthful. He breaks away at the halfway mark, temporarily, hiccuping quietly. He feels kind of--sluggish?--like he's getting sleepy--when he looks down at her breasts again. They're so huge that he wouldn't be able to hold them in his hands. It'd be really nice to lay his head on them, though. Soft and so comfortable.

(His own chest is getting softer.) (It's subtle, but it's true.)]

What the heck are you smiling about?

Edited 2016-08-23 14:48 (UTC)

[Shinji ought to have started being observant a long time ago. Ordinary sea creatures would have had no business drinking mashed-up passion fruit, unless it was mixed in with something else. Not that her brood is ordinary, of course, but they wouldn't have been drawn to it unless they'd recognized their mother and father in the syrupy, bubbly mixture. Asuka's mouth twitches upward, and she starts to giggle.]

Kaworu added something extra. He was thinking about you. He always is. [She shouldn't enjoy being deceptive around Shinji, and doesn't, not exactly, but he's sort of cute when he's confused and lazy like this. Funny. After Bardiel's contamination, despite a year of Lilin's best efforts against it, all Kaworu had to do was touch her to catalyze the process. A month in, and Shinji's already softening up, ready to be remolded. Asuka clenches her useless thighs all the more tightly together, but she can still smell her own lush wetness.]

You've gotten a lot cuter. [Her breasts press themselves even more insistently together, almost like an offering, as she leans to the side, grasping his warm, tanned arm. On his diet, he could survive another apocalypse easily. He could be happy easily. That's what Kaworu wants, too.] That's what I was smiling about.

Nagisa-kun... [Whoa. Shinji's cheeks flare up with more heat.] Nagisa-kun's always thinking about me? Seriously? [Someone has a filthy little crush, that's clear, no matter his efforts to sound innocent. He nervously sips from the cup.] I'll have to thank him later for... f-for whatever he put in here. It's amazing.

[And Asuka's random fidgeting serves to distract him again. He's still staring at her, uncertain and sidelong and tinged with regret. Sometimes, Asuka resembles the loud, domineering teenager that he knew long ago, but then she starts smiling at him--warmly, lovingly--and all of that falls to pieces. He doesn't know what to do with an Asuka who adores him and isn't afraid to show it.

Her hand comes to rest on his arm, then, and that alone is startling. Both Asuka and Kaworu have been touching him more, stroking him, just little moments here and there, like they're trying to coax something out of him.]

A lot cuter?

[His voice is a lot smaller, because he knows what she's getting at.]

That just isn't true, [he says as forcefully as he can.] I spend all day just sitting around and--and drinking-- [Another hiccup cuts him off, dainty and feminine. His eyes twitch with an unexpected rush of adrenaline. His mouth seems to dry out, then fill back in with driftwood and salt. He feels like he's stuck on an unsteady ship at sea, back when the blue sea existed--but instead of being seasick, he's drinking more juice. He guzzles the rest of the cup while ignoring the bigger imprint his ass is making in the sand.

He can't explain the sudden, imperiling thirst. It's like the longer she touches him, the more he wants to drink.]

Edited 2016-08-24 07:43 (UTC)

[Of course it's amazing. Asuka wishes she'd thought of it, honestly. Blood and breast milk just can't compare to desire. She wonders if Kaworu could impregnate her if she only swallowed his semen. She bets he could. If either of them want to, really want to, they can do anything. Be anything. Asuka doesn't have to walk on two legs any more than she has to have a tail-- they're just states of matter, that's all. Ice to water to steam, it's the same inherent composition.]

So? That doesn't matter. [Oh, oh. He's drained his whole cup now. There's still some left in the pitcher-- but Asuka's not satisfied with watching him drink, of being the predator, the aggressor. Touching and caressing him hasn't been enough in a long time, just the thinnest bandage against a gaping wound. If she wants him to be hers, her mate (their mate), she has to stake a bigger claim than feeding him from her body. He has to take his nutrition from the source.]

[Her elbow knocks abruptly against the pitcher, contents spilling, entirely of her own volition, on her body. Her breasts and stomach are especially soaked-- and she's wondering if it's enough. She's wondering if he'll crawl onto her to suck the juice off of her skin. She's wondering if she'll feel it against her as his butt continues to expand, as his chest softens into a proper bust. The way Kaworu must have felt as he set her free, except she was much more scared. She didn't understand.]

Oh! Sorry. [It's so transparent. Asuka's a laughably poor liar, even now, so she's not bothering as she curves a hand partway over one of her breasts, then turns it over, looking at her wet palm.] It's still bubbling. Look.

[Asuka might as well have shoved a steak knife into Shinji's gut. The awful sound he makes--it's somewhere between a cry of pain and a funeral lament. All that precious juice spills from the pitcher and he's too late to stop it. The empty cup falls to the ground, now that his fingers are lax with shock. The juice glimmers as it rushes over the sand and away from him.

A reasonable person would realize it only takes a few minutes to go back to the research station and fill up the pitcher again. That's definitely what a reasonable person would do. Grounded in logic, willing to think things through...]

You've ruined it, [he says, and it's like finding out Santa Claus doesn't exist. His voice is trembling.] You should've been more careful, you... [He looks like he's ready to burst into tears. She's drenched in juice and absolutely none of it is in his mouth. His eyes are tearing up. She's showing him her hand, saying something inane. His mouth is so dry that he's ready to scream. She has less than a palmful of juice, no more than a teaspon--

He shoves his mouth against Asuka's hand. He's almost feral about it, almost vicious, like this is a matter of life and death. His tongue roams over her skin--the flavor, it's--just--even better--she tastes so good--in search of every succulent drop. Before long, he's chasing the flavor up her forearm, then the inside of her elbow. Her bicep. He lands on her shoulder. He's in a frenzy by the time he's licking at her sternum. It isn't long before he's practically on top of her, his knees astride her thighs, suctioning sweet spots off of one of her breasts. This amount of contact is unprecedented.

If Asuka is paying attention, she'll feel how Shinji is getting heavier; she'll see how his ass is straining against the blue jersey shorts he's wearing. There's no way he can stop himself now. Just no way. He commits himself to a syrupy nipple with the same vicious exuberance as one of her children.]

[Shit, he's actually doing it. He's actually almost on top of her. Asuka's hips, traitorous, impatient, jerk forward nearly immediately, though she doesn't yet get much out of the friction. That's fine, though. She's waited fourteen years for him to reemerge into her life. She can wait a little longer.]

[The added pressure of his swelling ass pressed against her is plenty exciting enough, anyway. She'd really wondered what the juice would do to him when he'd first arrived, trying to sneak glances of his cock to see if it had grown. She thinks it has, some, but his rear's eclipsing it so far. If he gets a bigger ass than her, well, that'll just be unfair.]

[His tongue against her skin makes her groan helplessly. He's like a suckling infant trying to figure out how to latch, his mouth roving everywhere searching for just the right spot. For a few seconds, she's afraid he'll pull back, ashamed of himself for his stricken whining and his desperation-- but instead instinct leads him to just the spot. Not just licking the juice away from her skin but enveloping her nipple in his mouth. Her breaths are raspy-- it stings a bit as he first begins to suck, if only because his mouth's so much bigger than her other children, though just as rough (Kaworu, though, her mother and brother and mate, is so eager and yet so gentle when he's fed from her). One hand closes on his shoulder, the other resting against his hip, making sure they're flush against each other.]

Yeah. That's it. Mm, keep... keep going... good, Shinji, like that... [Her other nipple is trickling milk of its own accord, as if his mouth isn't already full. Her pussy's sopping wet. Every inch of her is begging to be taken. To take him.] Good boy. Oh...

[The first creamy mouthful of breast milk is what guarantees Shinji's addiction. He growls helplessly, clamping down harder, sucking with the full force of a riptide to get as much as possible. Each swallow only seems to make him thirstier and thirstier. It's crazy. The craziest thing is how he knows she'll never run out. He's seen her children nurse from her for hours at a time, borderline impossible to placate. One time, he accidentally came across Kaworu sucking on her, too, which made him feel equal parts horrified and envious...

All told, he's too overwhelmed and oblivious to understand what is happening to his body. His hips crack apart and push wider with merciless force, and his ass seems to double in size as it attempts to keep up. In less than a minute, his jersey shorts are down to threadbare status, the waistband digging deep into his flesh. He's very bottom heavy, absurdly so, but that's resolved when he suddenly bites down. Something compels him to clench his jaw, breaking through the thinnest skin around her nipple. The trickle of blood hits his tongue (like licking a piece of iron), then manifests as a jiggling pair of tits all his own.

With a frantic gasp, he turns his head away from Asuka's chest, dribbling milk and blood everywhere.] Asuka-- [He belches into a foghorn of a groan, an aftertaste that's still sweet. His stomach is cramping, distended, too full to be believed. He shudders and sloshes involuntarily.] Ohhh, damn, it hurts... urrrp...

Edited 2016-09-18 01:52 (UTC)

It hurts?

[The pain from that bite seems to vanish entirely once she feels and then sees exactly what it produced. Shinji's breasts, the immediacy with which they sprung into being, are just exhilarating. Big and unapologetic. They belong on him. They're right on him. This is exactly how he needs to be, for both of them. For their race.]

[Her clit's throbbing almost painfully, slick with her own juices, and finally she spreads her legs wide, the wet sheen almost glimmering in the morning light.]

[The way his hipbones crack and his ass swells up is so nostalgic. It's quicker with him, better with him. Between her and Kaworu, they figured out a way. Asuka reaches over, careless of her still leaking nipples and the blood dripping from one breast, and touches his stomach, rubbing it with one pale hand.] Too much? You can't have too much. [She's almost cooing. It's like he's not Ikari Shinji, her intended rival, but one of her little ones instead. Her other hand reaches around, tugging a bit too hard at the waistband of his shorts, causing it to snap.]

Hey, is that better?

[Shinji clumsily drops his hands on Asuka's shoulders, pushing himself back, struggling to keep himself at arm's length. Bleary-eyed, he looks down at the inhuman silhouette he's making--the forming bust line, the bulging abdomen. Another hiccup does nothing to dispel the intense pressure inside his gut. He doesn't seem to recognize himself as anything other than what he's supposed to be. The milk has compromised his judgment, degrading him to a series of hot impulses. Whatever feels good is exactly what he wants to do.]

It's... [Ohhh, it's weirdly maternal to have Asuka rubbing his stomach like that. He wonders where she learned to be so gentle and adoring.] It's still too much... [The gastric burbling lessens with each pass of her hand, but he's still very uncomfortable--

He gasps again, louder this time, when his jersey shorts tear away from his ass, revealing just how wide he's gotten, how hard his cock is. He's embarrassed, yet unbearably turned on right now. The Angel fluids continue to course through him, draining his skin of color; his face is losing those boyish angles. His thicker lips, wider mouth, and sharper teeth would make it even easier for him to latch onto her breasts.]

M'sorry, I didn't mean to bite you, I just...

[The sight of blood should be alarming, but he's already lowering his head, licking across the wound almost apologetically. His skin ripples like water as he feeds from her, reorganizing itself to be more sensitive and still sturdy. Later on, Kaworu will be sighing with relief to know that Shinji won't succumb to disease or the elements anytime soon. Shinji's safety was always his number one priority.]

It's okay. [Soft as she can't remember her own mother being. Asuka was never soft in front of Shinji when they were young, except for that one night at Misato's. It might be bewildering, thinking about the changes she's gone through, if it weren't so wonderful. The three of them are going to fix everything, one birth at a time.]

You've had it this whole time. We've been giving it to you. The blood, and... [She's so enthralled she doesn't even stop to wonder what he'll think about that revelation, doesn't consider if he'll be afraid or horrified or betrayed. Watching the Lilin drain away from him sip after sip is nothing compared to his alterations now. Losing pigmentation, clothes tearing away like tissue paper. Kaworu will be so happy, too. She wishes she could urge it along, deathly curious as to the extent of his mutations. If this is all, though, she's satisfied. Shinji's already beautiful.]

[Her eyes close for just a second before springing open again, mesmerized by the sight of him feeding from her, taking in her nutrients, her essence. She might orgasm right here as his plush lips cover her nipple, seem to swell around it, and she grunts, clasping onto him, hips wriggling impatiently for a release that hasn't happened yet.] We wanted you to be a part of this. Right from the start. That's what we wanted.

[In all honesty, Asuka is revealing things that Shinji should have known all along. His first dubious sip of fruit juice turned into an inescapable addiction almost overnight. That's why he should have known there was something... something wrong with it, and... his indignation drifts away in the first of many waves of contentment. It doesn't matter that the Angels essentially poisoned him, sabotaging his humanity. It doesn't matter that no one asked for his permission. As long as there's more for him to drink, he won't have many things to complain about...

He trades one delectable nipple for the other, more out of curiosity than anything else. The milk is no less perfect--warm, silky-smooth, coating his throat like cooking oil. Meanwhile, his uncomfortable fullness come and goes and comes again as he changes in various ways, propelled by an ancient alien design. His fingernails sharpen and lengthen like claws, giving him a better grip on her. Opalescent scales streak down his arms, his torso, across the backs of his legs, before disappearing under additional flesh. He only stops drinking when his breasts--really, his own breasts!--are large enough to rub up against her and steal away his attention.]

Hey...

[He lifts a hand and experimentally cups one of his breasts. It's real. It's unbelievable--but it's really here, quivering, overflowing his hand. He gives it a good shake, mesmerized by what he's seeing. Not disgusted. Not appalled.]

This is what you wanted...?

[It seems so absurd, but he's too drugged to react to the absurdity. He's more interested in squeezing his breast and shivering from how good it feels.]

Yeah. We weren't sure what was going to happen, but... we thought...

[Thought is too strong a term. The reality of it is that it simply seemed to make sense. Her babies were getting all the nutrients they needed from her milk, and before that, from her blood. What it had done for them, it would have to do for him. Their scientific considerations were nonexistent.]

[She's soaked through. She wonders if this is how Kaworu felt when she'd broken through and become herself. If this is how excited he was. The scrape of his nails makes her exhale softly-- oh, oh, fuck-- the streaks of scales, like a brief flash of light. His breasts are far bigger than she'd expected them to get. No stretch marks, nothing. Perfect. Maybe they'll both feed their children. Maybe he'll have some, too. Asuka's so overcome that she can't help herself, reaching over and squeezing his other breast, tracing a pale finger around one nipple.] We thought you'd be like us. We didn't want it to hurt. It doesn't hurt, right?

[Shinji closes his eyes tightly, whimpering quietly, trying and failing to think for himself. Everything about this insanity feels inevitable. Like it was written in stone somewhere a long time ago. Asuka and Kaworu-kun--they've been so worried about how frail and fragile he could be, a human stranded out in the wilderness. Like that one time he tripped and sprained his ankle, they cared for him day and night until he healed back up. Another time, he ate some undercooked meat from a dead animal and came down with a debilitating bout of food poisoning. That was a complete disaster. The Angels freaked the hell out, debating the merits of going back to the mainland to search for medicine, for a doctor, for anything to help Shinji. Thankfully, with a bit of luck, he recovered on his own.

His moaning is vibrant, almost melodic, reminiscent of a siren's song, when he brings up a hand to cup the back of Asuka's. He had no idea how sensitive his skin could be until just now. It feels so good that he can't remember what it was like to not feel this good all the time.] P-Please... [No pain. None whatsoever. His body is reaching equilibrium with every part of him exaggerated to some degree.] It doesn't hurt, so please don't stop... touching... please... [Even his hair is spreading over his eyes and around his shoulders like a prayer shawl. It's so thick and luxurious, sparkling in the sunlight. He could be confused for a fairy tale princess, if not for his hot and heavy dick.]

Okay.

[It's delicious. Seeing him moan and whimper, overcome in himself. He isn't in pain. He isn't afraid. She's reminded of how it felt with Kaworu that first time, in the changing room at NERV. Every touch had changed her, but she'd begged for them all. She doesn't regret it. She'll make sure Shinji doesn't regret it, either. This mutation is necessary. For Kaworu's happiness, for hers, for their world.]

Hey, Shinji, you're beautiful. [She's humming softly as her hand courses around his breast again. Then she turns her hand out of his grasp, cupping it herself, guiding it over his heavy breasts, urging him to admire his new state of being. Revel in it. Enjoy his soft, smooth skin, forever free now from the ravages of age and disease, his new, overwhelming sensitivity. The way his dark hair spills down-down-down like an inevitable waterfall finishes off the scene, a pretty contrast to his pallid skin.] Hey... hey... [He's ready. He's ready and she's sopping. His whole life has just been a prelude to this moment. Propelled by instinct, she crawls on top of him, mounting his dick, swollen, engorged, fulfilling everything. Fulfilling everything. She giggles as she sinks, pressing against his shoulders to urge his back against the sand.]

You're... so... we've been waiting so long, oh...

[The first time Shinji came across Asuka and Kaworu having sex with each other, he couldn't believe what he was seeing. It was off in the forest, up against one of the trees, with Asuka leaning on the trunk and Kaworu taking her from behind. They were laughing about it, mindlessly happy. In between giggles, even, Kaworu teased her for being impossible to satisfy... Shinji ran away from that spectacle as fast as his legs could carry him. He was shocked. Embarrassed. Confused. Concerned. And, most vexing of all, he was jealous. They were a nearly inseparable couple, even though they didn't use terms like "boyfriend" and "girlfriend." They were made for each other. Mating with each other. A level of committed to each other that Shinji could only fantasize about with one hand guiltily shoved down the front of his shorts. He never thought he'd find out what it was like to be a part of that.

He's finding out right now.

Mechanically, this is no different than any instance of fucking. His stiff cock slides into her vagina; she's on top of him, bearing down hard; he's lying back in the hot sand and groaning loudly. But there's more to it, there's something spiritual about it, this crackle of energy between their souls. They recognize and accept each other on some deep, private, all but forgotten level. It's a sudden sunburst of feeling that spreads light throughout every last one of his cells. He's glowing. It's difficult to see by the light of day, but he's glowing at the edges and especially from his eyes.]

Asuka... Asukaaa...

[It's just overwhelming. His eyes are filling up with tears, sparkling brighter than the fresh water lagoon close by. They're mystifying to him, but they must be happy tears--he's never felt as good as he does right now. His chest heaves up and down, breasts bouncing heavily, as he writhes and pleads for more and more (and please more) from her.]

[She's beside herself in ecstasy. She's been waiting for this for so long. Years, now. Her dreams of Shinji had mutated along with her body, transformed from simple, stupid desires like handholding and covert makeout sessions and maybe even a grope, if he'd been lucky and there instead of gone-- to procreation. To rebirth. And it had to be him. She and Kaworu both agreed on that, though she'd protested at first, still angry that he'd left her so long ago. That anger had dissolved like salt in water.]

Mmm... ohh...

[She rides out her own orgasm, bouncing up and down on his cock relentlessly. The gleam of him is unmistakable. Miraculous. Verifying that this is meant to be. Sanctified.]

[She can't wait until Kaworu sees. She can't wait until Kaworu gets his hands on him, gets to touch what was always his.]

[Her clit's swollen and throbbing and she's leaking her juices all over him, the clear liquid dripping with every movement, some finding its way to his stomach as if it were semen. She comes before he does and takes his orgasm as an opportunity to go for another of her own. Selfishly, she hopes he might have put a baby in her already.]

I'm here. I'm here.

[Shinji's flesh has been utterly transformed, but the great shift hasn't yet reached Shinji's brain--his mind--and it's running up against mortal limitations. There's a point where this feels so good is too much for him, where an orgasm is like a sledgehammer, smashing straight through him. He cries out, he struggles, he's consumed in heat, and then--

He passes out. His entire body goes loose and still, except for his engorged cock, which is still as straight as a metal rod and ten times as hard. No matter his state of mind, his body understands its biological imperative to make the most of Asuka's fertility. There's nothing to stop Asuka from riding him to another orgasm, and another one after that.]

... Asuka.

[But Kaworu has been watching them from ten paces away, unnoticed before now. They couldn't have noticed him when they were so committed to enjoying each other. He's naked as well, just as pale, but of the three he's easily identified as male to Asuka's female and Shinji's gorgeous, eye-catching blend of both sexes. The Angels have helped to create something that neither of them could have imagined.]

He should be allowed to rest after the morning's excitement, don't you think?

[He isn't concerned with Shinji's lack of consciousness. Even if it takes Shinji a while to recover, to wake back up, the Angels can assured that he'll be fine. He has to be fine. He's already an integral part of their family; this is just the beginning of a new chapter for them.]

Kaworu.

[Asuka's still riding his cock. It doesn't matter that Shinji's passed out. It doesn't matter. The rest of him can adjust when and as needed, but his body has already been remade for her. Her and Kaworu.]

[Nothing yet. No pinpricks of light and life. Asuka's face creases a bit in disappointment as she slowly, slowly climbs off him. Shinji's dick is still erect, of course, like the most obscene flag. Wobbling slightly (poor little legs, dripping with fluid and come), Asuka stumbles over to Kaworu, grabbing his arm like a small child.]

Did you see? Look at him-- look-- isn't he pretty? Isn't he perfect? [She's tugging him towards Shinji's comatose body.] Touch him. I know how much you've wanted to.

[Her other hand is sliding between her thighs, fingers intruding into her pussy. A rock of her hips and she admits a few words she can't put into sound.]

(i want to see, too)

Edited 2017-01-05 02:48 (UTC)

[Today feels like it should be declared a holiday. Like they should go back to the research station and throw themselves a celebration--maybe they could even have the leftover ice cream they've been saving for months now. Asuka's excitement is only matched by Kaworu's, as he laughs out loud and follows her over to Shinji's prone form. Shinji looks so peaceful lying in the sand and sunlight like that, even with a throbbing cock on display. He looks like the impossible made possible. A miracle realized in the flesh. Their very own miracle.]

He's beautiful, [Kaworu says in agreement.] I knew he was destined to blossom, but I didn't know it would be to this extent... [Shinji's breasts fill out a little more, pale and enticing, a magnet for attention. Kaworu licks his lips and wonders if Shinji will produce milk like Asuka does. He wonders how good it would taste...

Back to reality:] But I don't know that he would want me to touch him. He never told me that. [Kaworu's smile is no less heartfelt, no less pleased, but there's something uncertain in his eyes.] It's good enough to watch you enjoy him, and for him to enjoy you, too.

He never told you?

[She's surprised enough to stop touching herself, fingers curling over the inside of one soaked thigh. No way. Shinji had always been part of this, at least, from Kaworu's perspective, and she'd gone along with it happily, any bubbled-over resentment fading fast. Without Shinji, none of this would have been possible at all. She wouldn't have changed, wouldn't have mated with Kaworu... the Angels would have been just another extinct species on a dying Earth.]

But... he wants you. I know he does. [She's seen those longing looks, heard the way Shinji says Kaworu's name, like he's trying to breathe a wish into the air. She's not so overcome with breeding instinct that she doesn't notice the attraction. Kaworu clothed might be a bigger distraction for Shinji than Asuka with her bare breasts out in the open, letting her babies suckle.] He's for you, too. [Treacherously, her hand starts to edge back towards her pussy. God, why does Kaworu have to be so shy about this? Why isn't he jumping at the chance, the way he did with her years ago?]

We're all for each other. [More determined, now. Asuka's voice is a combination of wheedling and sweet and a little impatient as she crouches beside Shinji, stroking his long, dark hair. Maybe Kaworu can give him lots of babies of his own. He'd like that. Shinji would be a really good mother.] Come on. Kiss him. Just once.

[Kaworu's self-control has been next to nonexistent for a while now, but he's done his best to not upset Shinji by getting too close. The last thing he wants to do is to make Shinji any unhappier than he already is... (was?) (has the transformation cured him of sadness?) (could it be that miraculous?) Shinji stayed at the periphery of their lives, only engaging with them some of the time, behaving more like a trapped animal. The fruit juice changed that for the better. He became a little more trusting, a little less despondent. But still...

Shinji looked like he was enjoying himself with Asuka, at least. That has to count for something. With a slow exhale, Kaworu steps closer to Shinji, really studying what's happened to him. Shinji's skin looks so soft and slightly moist, like a newborn starfish. It's sensitive, too, because he moans faintly at the fingers sweeping near his scalp. That sound sends a mote of heat into Kaworu's groin, the precursor to arousal.]

What if Shinji-kun doesn't want me to kiss him? [asks Kaworu, uncharacteristically uncertain.] I don't know that I could forgive myself if he didn't approve of it... [Regardless, he's kneeling down beside Asuka, beside Shinji, leaning his weight on one hand. His other hand lifts up, then pauses, just as uncertain, and finally comes down on the nearest unbelievable curve of Shinji's breast. So soft, as expected. So warm. Almost hot. Kaworu suddenly can't stop himself from leaning in and all the way down, so he can kiss Shinji on the mouth. He resembles the perennial prince in one of those fairy tales from centuries ago.]

Mm, he tastes like you...

[The stimulation somehow adds to the volume of Shinji's lips. Incredible.]

Edited 2017-01-28 20:57 (UTC)

[Oh, oh. Yes. So much of Asuka has changed over the years. Maybe she's not cured of her own sadness, but she has a purpose beyond her wildest dreams, beyond what Lilin could have offered her. That's enough to put all but her most dismal miseries far behind her, past the red horizon. In time, it'll be the same for Shinji. In time, he'll recognize that they'll make the world over, the three of them, make it something whole and beautiful once more.]

[She can't slake her desire just with masturbation, but she tries as she watches Kaworu kiss him. Already, she's imagining Kaworu fucking him, right here. Just lifting up his legs and going for it. Poor Kaworu. He's had her so long, but he's wanted Shinji, too. That doesn't make her jealous the way it would have years ago. It's okay. More than okay, it's necessary. It's good. As natural and praiseworthy as feeding her babies. Sensual, too. They've birthed him and they'll breed with him. Asuka grunts as she moves her hand against her pussy, hips rocking, eyes wholly intent on the scene. Prince Charming couldn't have done better.]

He should taste like you, too. He... he couldn't get enough of the juice. I said you'd added something special. [She smiles, running a finger against Shinji's swollen lips once Kaworu's withdrawn, murmuring softly.] Give him another taste once he wakes up.

[The subtle and slippery sounds of Asuka's fingers meeting with her pussy is, in a word, galvanizing. Kaworu feels his resolve weakening, crumbling away, and he leans in as soon as he can for a much deeper kiss. Still unconscious, Shinji is responsive in his own way: the shift of his long, shapely legs; a moan that's more like a sigh; his fingers curling into the sand. Kaworu pulls back with a heartfelt laugh, almost drunk with joy.]

It wasn't my intention to deceive him with that... [He runs one hand down Shinji's chest, over his stomach, all the way to the base of his newly prominent cock.] As long as he's safe, as long as he's happy, that is the only thing that matters to me. I thought the juice would be the most effective panacea. [He didn't expect Shinji's swift addiction, but he's glad for it all the same. Now that Shinji is more or less immortal, they can stay with one another forever--forever and ever.

Shinji's eyelashes flutter when Kaworu gives his dick a welcoming squeeze. Not enough for him to awaken, but he'll get there soon enough, it seems. Even though Kaworu wants to wait for him to wake up, it's just...

Kaworu inhales deeply. Yeah. That's all the confirmation he needs.]

I want to put my cock inside him, [is Kaworu's murmur of a confession.] I can smell him. I can smell how he's changed... He's become so fertile, Asuka. If I put my cock inside him right now, he would come to bear my children. I'm certain of that much. [His eyes--crimson, illuminated from within--flicker up to her for validation or permission or something like it.]

[Poor Kaworu, always so concerned. She hadn't been worried about any moral implications of deceiving Shinji, withholding the ingredients of the passion fruit juice. Asuka hasn't worried about any moral implications since NERV first put her in the tank years ago. It's just like when Kaworu had to convince Dr. Lorenz. A necessary step. A needful thing. Besides, Shinji's conversion as it is has been so much more peaceful than her own was. They've done well by him.]

Mmm... [So fertile, Kaworu says. So far, that's the only thing that's made Asuka jealous. She knows she isn't pregnant with Shinji's babies, and yet Kaworu's sure he can impregnate him. She doesn't doubt him, either, and doesn't concern herself with the mechanisms behind it. But they've got time. Shinji's got time to fill her up. It's going to be amazing, helping Shinji through, watching his belly round out, rubbing his feet, pampering him, fucking him. Asuka could probably still calculate how much adding him has improved the speed of their repopulation, but numbers lost interest with the span of eternity.]

Then do it. [Her voice is warm. She won't deprive him. She never could deprive Kaworu of anything.] He's always been yours. [But she's not so magnanimous she'll content herself with masturbating to the scene, appealing as it is. She shifts, reaching for one of Shinji's arms, murmuring as she strokes a finger down the small streaks of scales there, touching then his longer, sharper fingernails, like the claws of a predator. She turns his hand over to his palm, holding it by her pussy as she rubs herself against it, getting herself off with his hand. It's a generous move on her part, letting Kaworu have the rest of him. It's also calculated, of course-- all and all, as her breaths get heavier, this spot is providing the best view possible.]

I can't wait. I want to see it all.

[Asuka's encouragement is its own species of seduction, melting away concerns and what-ifs and maybes. Ever since her skin peeled away, ever since her glorious rebirth, she has been unapologetic about what she wants and won't stop fighting until she has it. So, she wants to see Kaworu put his cock inside Shinji, and Kaworu knows there's no point to further resistance. This is pretty much what they were working towards all along, after all...

Shinji has gotten so wide in the hips that it's actually kind of difficult to grasp him by one. Plenty of room, Kaworu thinks, spreading apart Shinji's legs and repositioning them higher. The little ones should appreciate that. Aside from a faint tremor in his thighs, Shinji is malleable, pliable, like a living and life-sized doll. He's very warm, too. Filled with heat from his newly forged core, imbued with infinity. Kaworu nudges closer, making sure they're aligned, and then he casts one more look at Asuka--

Oh, the way she's using Shinji's hand to stimulate herself is so ingenious.]

I'm doing it. You don't have to wait because I'm doing it right now.

[Shinji awakens--if it can even be called that--it's more like sliding out of a deep, dense fog--to a sensation he can only describe as amazing. He feels full, weirdly full, stretched from the inside out, but it's electrifying for his nerves. Given his muddled mind, it's pure instinct that drives him to roll his hips and push back against whatever-it-is that's filling him up, bringing him closer to completion.

He blearily opens his eyes and watches as Kaworu leans into view somewhere above him. He doesn't get a chance to ask what's going on before his entire body goes taut, a seizure brought on by pleasure, too much too soon. His fingers flail against--something different--it's soft, and it's wet. Then his fingers curl inward against Asuka's--oh god, Asuka--her pussy--it's really wet--but within seconds his bewildered thoughts recede into contentment.]

I think he likes it, [Kaworu says, smiling brazenly.]

You think? [In front of him, Asuka's pushing herself towards a heated orgasm. Shinji's curling fingers against her pussy are just the surprise she needs to come with a low groan. He's soaked up to his forearm with her slick, clear juices.]

[It's all even better than she'd imagined it. Kaworu looks so perfect fucking Shinji. It's like watching a sacred, ancient ritual, a priest to a goddess. No jealousy, no greed, and every reflexive push of Shinji's hips is like a parishioner's needy refrain. The whole scene is hypnotizing enough she thinks she could watch for days without demanding too much more participation than his hand stroking her cunt.]

I told you. [She laughs softly, high and girlish. How many babies will Kaworu give him? How many, for his first litter? Asuka moves Shinji's fingers gracelessly, pushing his index finger right inside her, the elongated nail no trouble at all.] You like it, Shinji?

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i doubt; i fear; i think strange things which i dare not confess to my own soul.

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